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What did the mitochondria put on its dating profile?

I'm the powerhouse of this relationship.

Why did the neutron never get charged at the bar?

Because it always had no charge.

What did the mango say to the coconut on the tropical island?

You're a tough one on the outside, but I know you're sweet on the inside — you just won't let anyone crack you.

Why did the chili pepper write a memoir?

It had a really heated past.

What did the pita bread say to the regular bread?

You're good, but I've got more pockets than you.

Why did the gumbo win the cooking competition?

The judges said it had layers of flavor that were absolutely stew-pendous.

What did the pecan say to the walnut at the bake sale?

You're one tough nut to crack, but I think we're shell-mates.

Why did the cornbread apply for a leadership role?

It wanted to prove it was more than just a side.

What did the onion say to the chef who wouldn't stop cutting?

You're really making me tear up here.

Why was the celery stick always chosen last for dodgeball?

Everyone knew it would just stalk around and never commit.