Corny Dad Jokes

Why are pediatricians always so cheerful?

Because their work is child's play.

What did the patient say after the successful brain surgery?

Thanks, doc — I've had a real change of mind.

Why did the anesthesiologist get promoted?

He always put everyone at ease.

What do you call a podiatrist who loves music?

A sole artist.

Why did the radiologist break up with the ultrasound tech?

There was no chemistry — only soundwaves.

What did the surgeon say before removing the patient's funny bone?

This might not be very humerus.

Why was the dermatologist such a great comedian?

She always delivered her lines with perfect de-livery… I mean, de-rash-ional timing.

What did the blood cell say when it got lost?

I think I took the wrong artery — now I'm all veined up.

Why did the pharmacist become a DJ?

He was already great at dropping tablets.

What did the stethoscope say on Valentine's Day?

I only have ears for you.

Why did the orthopedic surgeon start a band?

He was great at setting bones and dropping beats.

What do you call a doctor who can't stop telling jokes?

A witty physician — he really knows how to crack you up… and your spine.

Why did the cardiologist always win at poker?

Because he knew when to hold and when to fold — he could read every heartbeat.

Why did the school calendar break up with the planner?

Their days together were numbered.

Why was the school map always invited to parties?

It knew how to show everyone a good latitude.