Corny Dad Jokes

Why was the scarecrow good at lacrosse?

He was outstanding in his field.

Why did the baseball player get arrested at the store?

He was caught stealing second.

Why was the ping pong player a great employee?

He always knew how to rally the team.

What lights up a soccer stadium?

A soccer match.

Why do bowling pins have such a tough life?

They're always getting knocked down but expected to bounce back.

Why did the hockey player open a bakery?

He was great at icing.

What do sprinters eat before a race?

Nothing — they fast.

Why did the golfer bring an extra shirt?

In case he got a hole in one.

Why was the soccer field always wet?

Because the players kept dribbling on it.

Why did the tennis player bring a fan to the match?

Because she wanted more love in the stands.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?

A stick.

Why are baseball games at night?

Because bats sleep during the day.

Why did the football go to the bank?

Because it wanted to get its quarter back.

What do you call a smartphone that won't stop arguing?

A de-bait phone.

Why did the VPN never get caught telling lies?

It always covered its tracks.