Dad Jokes for Work

Why did the caveman keep bumping into things?

Because they lived in the dark ages — before the Stone Age even got lit!

Why did the computer freeze?

It left its Windows open.

What do you call a medieval king who surveys his land?

A ruler!

What did the spider do on the computer?

Made a website.

Why did the ancient Greek athlete refuse dessert?

Because they were already running the marathon!

Why did the developer go broke?

He used up all his cache.

What do history teachers and judges have in common?

They both care about dates and sentences!

What's a computer's favorite snack?

Microchips.

Why was the Civil War soldier such a good comedian?

Because they always knew which side to pick!

Why did the programmer quit his job?

He didn't get arrays.

What do you call a lazy pharaoh?

A mummy — they're always wrapped up in something!

Why don't robots ever panic?

They have nerves of steel — literally.

Why did the ancient Roman wear armor to bed?

In case they had to fight off a knight-mare!

What do you call a laptop on the beach?

A Dell rolling in the deep — sand.

What did the colonist say about their new taxes?

That's the last straw — time for a Boston Tea Party!