👔 Father's Day Dad Jokes

My dad always said 'never invest in trampolines.'

He said it's a market with too many ups and downs.

I told my son I was named after Abraham Lincoln.

He said 'But dad, your name is Brian.' I said 'I know, I was named after him — he was named first.'

Why did the dad whisper at the grocery store?

He didn't want to wake the sleeping bags!

Why did the daughter bring a broom to her dad's birthday?

She heard it was going to be a sweeping celebration!

Why did the dad put wheels on his rocking chair?

He wanted to rock and roll!

Why did the dad sit on the newspaper?

He wanted to be on top of current events!

Why did the new dad stare at the frozen juice can?

Because it said 'concentrate'!

My daughter asked me what I'm posting on social media.

I told her I'm not posting, I'm dad-a-basing.

What do you call a dad who's also a gardener?

A plant parent!

Why are dad jokes so reliable?

Because they're full of pop culture!

What do you call a dad who falls through the ice?

A pop-sicle!

What did the daddy tomato say to the baby tomato on a walk?

Ketchup!

Why did the dad bring a ladder to the family reunion?

Because he wanted to raise the bar!

What do you call a frozen dad joke?

A pun-sicle.

Hey, dad, did you get a haircut?

No, I got them all cut.