Short Dad Jokes

What did the screw say to the drill?

You really drive me in circles!

Why did the weather forecaster bring a bar of soap?

She was expecting showers!

Why did the beam get promoted?

Because it was outstanding in its field — and load-bearing!

What did the dirt say to the rain?

If this keeps up, my name will be mud!

What do scaffolds and good friends have in common?

They both support you when things get high!

Why do rivers never get lost?

Because they always follow the current!

Why did the electrician become a construction worker?

He wanted to stay grounded!

What did the thunder say to the lightning?

You're truly shocking!

What do you call a lazy bulldozer?

A bulldozer — it's always pushing things off!

Why don't flowers ever drive safely?

Because they keep putting the petal to the metal!

Why do construction workers make great comedians?

They always bring down the house!

What's a mountain's favorite candy?

Snow caps!

What did the roof say to the house?

I've got you covered!

Why did the gardener plant lightbulbs?

He wanted to grow a power plant!

Why did the hammer go to school?

To hit the books!