Short Dad Jokes

Why did the spelling bee champion never lose?

She always had the last word.

Why did the Egyptian pharaoh go to the dentist?

Because Egypt had de-Nile about its cavities!

Why did the backpack feel stressed?

It was carrying a lot of weight — especially in math.

What kind of music did the Pilgrims listen to?

Plymouth Rock!

Why did the period break up with the question mark?

It was tired of all the questioning.

Why did the medieval knight always carry a pencil?

In case they needed to draw their sword!

Why was the dictionary always invited to parties?

It was the life of the definition.

Why did the student put his test in the freezer?

He wanted a cold, hard grade.

What kind of school do you go to if you're a giant?

High school.

Why did the protractor fail the exam?

It could only see things from a certain angle.

What did the patient say after getting a brain transplant?

I changed my mind!

Why was the comma so bossy in English class?

It always knew when to pause.

Why did the cell phone go to the doctor?

Because it lost its reception!

Why did the art teacher get promoted?

She could draw conclusions.

What do you call a doctor who's always on the move?

A running nose specialist!