Short Dad Jokes

What did the hockey puck say to the stick?

Quit pushing me around!

What do you call a car in a swimming pool?

A carpool!

Why was the fencing champion always calm?

She knew how to handle the pressure — one point at a time.

Why did the mechanic break up with the car?

There was too much exhaust-ion in the relationship!

Why don't rugby players ever get cold?

They're always surrounded by try lines.

What do you call a car that's been to the gym?

A muscle car!

What did the bowling pins say when they saw the ball coming?

Let's split!

Why don't cars ever win at poker?

Because they always show their turn signals!

Why did the bicycle fall over at the finish line?

It was two-tired.

What kind of car does a Jedi drive?

A Toy-Yoda!

Why are track athletes bad at keeping secrets?

They're always running their mouths.

Why did the traffic light turn red?

Because it had to change in front of everyone!

Why did the volleyball player join the Marines?

She heard they needed a good serve.

What's a boxer's favorite drink?

Punch.

Why did the car apply for a job?

It wanted to quit being idle!