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I entered ten puns in a contest to see if any would win.

My uncle named his dogs Rolex and Timex.

I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes.

I accidentally swallowed some food coloring.

My doctor told me I'm going deaf.

I got a job at a mirror factory.

A steak pun is a rare medium well done.

My boss told me to have a good day.

I told my suitcase there would be no vacation this year.

I used to hate facial hair.