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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.

What do you call a train loaded with bubble gum?

A chew-chew train.

Why did the broom get a promotion?

It swept the competition.

Why did the smartphone need glasses?

It lost all its contacts.

What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine's Day?

I'm stuck on you.

Why did the electrician close his shop?

Business was no longer current.

What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer.

What did the ocean say to the sailboat?

Nothing, it just waved.

Why did the banker break up with the calculator?

She felt she could no longer count on it.

What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backward?

A receding hare-line.