Corny Dad Jokes

Why did the computer need a blanket?

It kept freezing.

What did the router say to the doctor?

It hurts when IP.

Why don't programmers like to go outside?

The sun causes too many screen glares.

What do you call a computer that can sing opera?

A Dell.

Why did the developer bring a net to work?

To catch all the bugs.

What did the old hard drive say at its retirement party?

It's been a good run — I'm just not as driven anymore.

Why did the smartphone go to school?

To improve its reception.

What did the desk lamp say when it got a raise?

I'm absolutely glowing!

Why did the office fridge write a memoir?

It had seen things expire that no one should have to witness.

What do you call a motivational speaker at a battery factory?

Someone who really knows how to recharge a crowd.

Why did the receptionist break up with the delivery driver?

They kept sending mixed packages.

What did the file folder say during its exit interview?

I'm just ready to close this chapter.

Why did the paycheck go to therapy?

It had too many deductions about its self-worth.

What do you call an office with no windows?

A Mac environment.

Why did the annual review bring tissues?

It knew there would be some performance issues.