Corny Dad Jokes

What do you call a sad cup of coffee?

A depresso.

Why did the map always win arguments?

It had a lot of good points.

What do you call a seagull that flies over the bay?

A bagel.

Why did the pillow go to court?

It wanted to rest its case.

What did the blanket say to the bed?

Don't worry, I've got you covered.

Why did the fence go to the hospital?

It had too many picket injuries.

Why did the roof go to the doctor?

It had shingles.

Why did the tire go to college?

It wanted a higher degree of rotation.

What do you call a pony with a sore throat?

A little hoarse.

Why did the librarian get kicked off the airplane?

It was overbooked.

What do you call a row of rabbits walking backward?

A receding hareline.

Why did the computer go fishing?

To catch some bytes.

What do you call a hen looking at a bowl of lettuce?

Chicken Caesar salad.

Why did the lemon go to the doctor?

It wasn't peeling well.

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?

An investigator.