Short Dad Jokes

Why was the archaeologist always broke?

His career was in ruins.

What did the Aztec calendar say to the Gregorian calendar?

Your days are numbered.

Why did the ancient Greek philosopher refuse dessert?

He had too much on his Plato.

What did the Ottoman Empire say when it finally collapsed?

I'm just going to put my feet up.

Why did the Viking refuse to email his battle plans?

He preferred to Norse code.

Why did the Roman senator bring a salad to the forum?

He heard they were going to address Caesar.

What did the ancient Egyptian architect say after building the pyramids?

That's a wrap.

Why was the calculus teacher so popular at parties?

She knew all the limits.

What did the hypotenuse say to the two legs of the triangle?

Without me, you two are just not right.

Why did the integer refuse to become a decimal?

He didn't see the point.

Why did the exponent feel superior?

Because it was always on a higher level.

What do you call a teapot full of math equations?

A brewing solution.

Why was the geometry book always in a bad mood?

It had too many problems and not enough solutions.

What did the even number say to the odd number?

Something about you just doesn't add up.

Why did the math teacher plant old worksheets in her garden?

She wanted to grow square roots.