Short Dad Jokes

Why did the lasagna go to therapy?

It had too many layers to unpack.

Why was the garlic bread so popular at school?

It was always toasty and never crusty with anyone.

Why was the stew always so philosophical?

It spent a lot of time simmering on things.

What did the whisk say to the eggs every morning?

Let me give you a good beating to start the day!

Why did the noodle get promoted?

It was great at using its noodle.

What did the dumpling say to the steamer?

You really know how to get me all hot and bothered.

Why did the hummus win the debate?

Its arguments were well-blended and hard to spread thin.

What did the cinnamon roll say on its birthday?

I'm on a roll — this is the sweetest day ever!

What did the soufflé say to the oven timer?

Don't pressure me — I'll rise to the occasion.

Why did the rice file a noise complaint?

The beans next door wouldn't stop being gassy.

What did the olive say at the job interview?

I work well under pressure — just ask the oil.

Why was the granola bar such a good mediator?

It always held things together.

What did the wok say to the frying pan?

You're not as deep as you think you are.

Why did the crouton refuse to leave the salad bowl?

It was on a roll and didn't want to toss it away.

Why was the baguette always getting into arguments?

It had a real crusty attitude.