“What Did The... Say” Jokes

What did the helium atom do when it walked into a bar?

The bartender said, "We don't serve noble gases here." Helium didn't react.

What did the planet say when it got kicked out of the solar system?

I'm so Pluto right now — totally dwarf-ed by the competition.

What did the seismograph say on a boring day?

Nothing's shaking — this job has its ups and downs.

What did the paleontologist say at the surprise birthday party?

I dig this!

What did the telescope say to the microscope?

You really need to look at the bigger picture.

What did the Kelvin scale say to Celsius at the party?

You may be popular, but I've got absolute zero chill.

What did the biologist say when asked why they kept twins in the lab?

One's the control group.

What did the geologist say to the comedian who bombed?

Don't worry, your comedy will improve with enough pressure and time.

What did the RNA say when DNA got all the credit?

Without me, your message would never get delivered.

What did the black hole say to the star that got too close?

I find you very attractive — you could say I'm drawn to you.

What did the mitochondria put on its dating profile?

I'm the powerhouse of this relationship.

What did the mango say to the coconut on the tropical island?

You're a tough one on the outside, but I know you're sweet on the inside — you just won't let anyone crack you.

What did the pita bread say to the regular bread?

You're good, but I've got more pockets than you.

What did the pecan say to the walnut at the bake sale?

You're one tough nut to crack, but I think we're shell-mates.

What did the onion say to the chef who wouldn't stop cutting?

You're really making me tear up here.