Why do nurses like red crayons?
Sometimes they have to draw blood.
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2
Wife: Honey I’m pregnant. Me: Well…. what do we do now?
Wife: Well, I guess we should go to a baby doctor. Me: Hm.. I think I’d be a lot more comfortable going to an adult doctor.
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Why did the house go to the doctor?
It was having window panes.
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Why did Sweden start painting barcodes on the sides of their battleships?
So they could Scandinavian.
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Why do nurses carry around red crayons?
Sometimes they need to draw blood.
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How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb? 1 or 2? 1...
or 2?
7
How does a French skeleton say hello?
Bone-jour.
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What do you call a pig with three eyes?
Piiig
9
What time did the man go to the dentist?
Tooth hurt-y.
10
Why do wizards clean their teeth three times a day?
To prevent bat breath!
11
How are false teeth like stars?
They come out at night!
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How can you tell a vampire has a cold?
They start coffin.
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What happens when you anger a brain surgeon?
They will give you a piece of your mind.
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When do doctors get angry?
When they run out of patients.
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What did the doctor say to the gingerbread man who broke his leg?
Try icing it.
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What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh.
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Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot!
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Why don't skeletons ride roller coasters?
They don't have the stomach for it.
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What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Between us, something smells!
20
What kind of award did the dentist receive?
A little plaque.