Why did the skeleton go to the hospital dance alone?
He had no body to go with.
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20 Best Doctor & Medical Dad Jokes
Prescribing laughter, one pun at a time.
Browse all medical jokes »
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2
Hey, dad, did you get a haircut?
No, I got them all cut.
3
Why did the anesthesiologist get promoted?
He always put everyone at ease.
4
Have you heard about corduroy pillows?
They're making headlines!
5
What do you call a doctor who's always on the move?
A running nose specialist!
6
What did the allergist say to the anxious patient?
Don't worry, I'll get to the root of your reaction.
7
Cosmetic surgery used to be such a taboo subject.
Now you can talk about Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.
8
What did the dentist say to the computer?
This won't hurt a byte!
9
Doctor: Do you want to hear the good news or the bad news?
Patient: Good news please. Doctor: we're naming a disease after you.
10
Why doesn't the Chimney-Sweep call out sick from work?
Because he's used to working with a flue.
11
What did the surgeon say to the patient who insisted on closing their own incision?
Suture self!
12
Why did the pillow go to the doctor?
It was feeling stuffed up!
13
Why do nurses like red crayons?
Sometimes they have to draw blood.
14
Why did the doctor carry a red pen?
In case they needed to draw blood!
15
How does a French skeleton say hello?
Bone-jour.
16
What type of music do chiropractors listen to?
Hip pop!
17
Why did the germ cross the microscope?
To get to the other slide!
18
What did the doctor say to the gingerbread man who broke his leg?
Try icing it.
19
Wife: Honey I’m pregnant. Me: Well…. what do we do now?
Wife: Well, I guess we should go to a baby doctor. Me: Hm.. I think I’d be a lot more comfortable going to an adult doctor.
20
Why did the nurse bring a ladder to work?
Because they heard the patients were on a higher floor of recovery!