What do elves do after school?
Their gnomework!
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Why does Santa go down chimneys?
Because it soots him!
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Why is it so cold at Christmas?
Because it's in Decembrrrr!
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What did Mrs. Claus say during the thunderstorm?
Come look at the rain, dear!
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What do you call Santa when he's broke and walking backward?
Strapped for Claus!
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What kind of photos do elves take?
Elfies!
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What do you call an elf who sings?
A wrapper!
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Why did the Christmas cookie go to the hospital?
Because it was feeling crummy!
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What do you call a broke Santa?
Saint Nickel-less!
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How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together.
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If you’re struggling to think of what to get someone for Christmas.
Get them a fridge and watch their face light up when they open it.
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Why is Santa so good at karate?
Because he has a black belt!
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?
Sandy Claws!
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What do you call Santa when he stops moving?
Santa Pause!
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?
A Holly Davidson!
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What's the best thing to put into a Christmas cake?
Your teeth!
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Why does Scrooge love reindeer?
Because every single buck is dear to him!
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How was the snow globe feeling after the storm?
A little shaken.
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What's every parent's favorite Christmas carol?
Silent Night!
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Why did Rudolph get a bad report card?
Because he went down in history!
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Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit!
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What do gingerbread men use to make their beds?
Cookie sheets!
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What do snowmen call their offspring?
Chill-dren!
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite.
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What did the doctor say to the gingerbread man who broke his leg?
Try icing it.