What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in dirt, and crosses back?
A dirty double-crosser.
The funniest animal puns and one-liners in the deck.
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What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in dirt, and crosses back?
A dirty double-crosser.
Did you hear about the cow who jumped over the barbed wire fence?
It was udder destruction.
Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water?
Because he was a little horse!
What did the owl say to its Valentine?
Owl always love you!
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the Shell station.
I accidentally took my cats meds last night.
Don’t ask meow.
Why did the horse chew with its mouth open?
Because it had bad stable manners.
Why did the man run around his bed?
Because he was trying to catch up on his sleep!
What do you call an ant that skips school?
A truant.
What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop.
What do you call a bear caught in the rain?
A drizzly bear.
Why did the sheep get detention?
It was always baaad in class.
What did the dog say to the two trees?
Bark bark.
What do you call a dog that's been out in the cold?
A pupsicle.
Ever wondered why bees hum?
It's because they don't know the words.
What do you call a fly with no wings?
A walk.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
What do you call a dinosaur that's a noisy sleeper?
A Bronto-snorus.
What happened when the Easter Bunny met his true love?
They lived hoppily ever after!
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the 'p' is silent.
Why did the feline fail the lie detector test?
Because he be lion.
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?
You can tune a guitar but you can't "tuna" fish!
What did the buffalo say when his son left for college?
Bison.
What happens when you cross a sheep with a kangaroo ?
A woolly jumper!
What do you call a crow sitting on a telephone wire?
A long-distance caw.