What did the dog say to the two trees?
Bark bark.
1
2
What did the mountain climber name his son?
Cliff.
3
I won an argument with a weather forecaster once.
His logic was cloudy...
4
Why do birds fly south for the winter?
Because it's too far to walk.
5
What did the big flower say to the littler flower?
Hi, bud!
6
What do you get hanging from Apple trees?
Sore arms.
7
Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water?
Because if they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat.
8
What has a bed that you can’t sleep in?
A river.
9
How do the trees get on the internet?
They log on.
10
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
Look for fresh prints.
11
How do you make a water bed more bouncy.
You use Spring Water
12
How many apples grow on a tree?
All of them!
13
How do you get a baby alien to sleep?
You rocket.
14
Don't buy flowers at a monastery.
Because only you can prevent florist friars.
15
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite.
16
Why did the house go to the doctor?
It was having window panes.
17
What do you call two guys hanging out by your window?
Kurt & Rod.
18
Why don't you find hippopotamuses hiding in trees?
They're really good at it.
19
I'll tell you what often gets over looked...
garden fences.
20
Where do fish keep their money?
In the riverbank