What did the roof say to the house?
I've got you covered!
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Why do pumpkins sit on people’s porches?
They have no hands to knock on the door.
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Why did the house go to the doctor?
It was having window panes.
4
What do you call two guys hanging out by your window?
Kurt & Rod.
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Why did the beam get promoted?
Because it was outstanding in its field — and load-bearing!
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What do you call a crane that tells jokes?
A lift of the party!
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Why did the construction worker break up with the calculator?
He couldn't count on it anymore!
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Why was the paint can always the center of attention?
It knew how to make a good first coat impression!
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Why did the hammer go to school?
To hit the books!
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What do you get if you put a duck in a cement mixer?
Quacks in the pavement.
11
Why do concrete workers have great memories?
Because everything they do is set in stone!
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What did the cement mixer say on its birthday?
Let's get this party stirred up!
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What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 4K?
"HDMI"
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Why did the construction worker sleep on the job?
He was building up rest!
15
What's a bricklayer's least favorite day?
When everything comes crumbling down!
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What do you call a snake who builds houses?
A boa constructor!
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What do you call a lazy bulldozer?
A bulldozer — it's always pushing things off!
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Did you hear about the cow who jumped over the barbed wire fence?
It was udder destruction.
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What's a builder's favorite type of music?
Heavy metal!
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Why did the tomato blush?
Because it saw the salad dressing.