Work Dad Jokes

Why did the paycheck go to therapy?

It had too many deductions about its self-worth.

What do you call an office with no windows?

A Mac environment.

Why did the annual review bring tissues?

It knew there would be some performance issues.

What did the whiteboard marker say when it retired?

I've made my mark on this company.

Why did the temp worker bring a calendar to every meeting?

Their days were numbered.

What did the conference table say to the chairs?

I've got you all covered.

Why did the shredder quit its job?

It was tired of everyone feeding it garbage.

What do you call an employee who works in a mirror store?

Someone who can really see themselves in the job.

Why did the office door get promoted?

Because it was always open to new opportunities.

What do you call a report that's always late?

A deadline-r.