Work Dad Jokes

What did the deadline say to the procrastinator?

We need to stop meeting like this — always at the last minute.

Why did the keynote speaker bring bread to the conference?

They wanted to raise a toast to the team.

What did the manager say about the new open floor plan?

There are no barriers to communication — or privacy.

Why did the printer go to the doctor?

It had a paper jam and couldn't stop feeding.

What did the CEO say when the elevator broke?

I guess we'll have to take steps to fix this.

Why did the whiteboard feel so accomplished?

Because people kept saying it was remarkable.

What did the out-of-office reply say?

I'm not here right now, but your email is very important to no one.

Why did the accountant break up with the calculator?

They felt like they were just being used for their numbers.

What did one cubicle wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner — same time, same partition.

Why did the employee bring a mirror to the performance review?

They wanted to reflect on their work.