One-liners jokes

I went to a wedding where two satellite dishes got married.

The ceremony was okay but the reception was incredible.

I bought shoes from a drug dealer once.

I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.

My wife says my obsession with tower defense games is childish.

But she needs to stop attacking me — I've got walls up.

I used to run a dating service for chickens.

But I kept struggling to make hens meet.

I got hit in the head with a can of soda today.

Luckily it was a soft drink.

I tried to make a pencil with two erasers.

It was pointless.

My ceiling isn't the best, but it's up there.

It really tops everything else in the house.